I’ve always thought it’ll be long until I develope the feeling of wanting children of my own. Because I already have 9 nephews and nieces.

But not until recently.

Some weeks ago, suddenly at night I cried my self to sleep because I want to hold a baby. My baby. Who’ll call me “Mama” or “Ibu” or “Bunda”. Those tiny hands, tiny feet, tiny fingers. And there’s no doubt that they’re mine.


I rarely have specific desire. But when I do, I want it bad. So bad.